Drifting

The past weeks were full of talks and insights shared. The last rules review is going to evolute into the next one, due in two days.

The new "contract over rules over will over wishes" system needs more finetuning. The nature of the dynamic is shifting. Sexually she is submitting deeper, closer to her edge, while in the other area's she can be more bratty and playful.

We noticed that during long workdays, or travel, when I am away, the dynamic is stressed, and she has difficulty to stay focussed. Drifting off into the gardens of the castle, doubting her actions, doubting if she is a good submissive. I started to challenge her wearing ben-wa balls when I am not home. No enforced times, just wearing them and reporting to me how long she is able to keep them in. This creates layers of connection, anticipation, and lust. So far it is working well.

Comming home to my dripping wet needy cunt is a great welcome. And treating her like a fucktoy a great release. Making her wear her onesie backwards, spreading her legs, lifting her shackled wrists. Hearing her breathing heavily as the toys are inserted. Her moans and wriggling are useless. It is when the tears of submission flow that she drifts off to subspace ready to be fucked like a ragdoll.

Of Wolf and Man

Rules revision was skipped last week due to a busy schedule, but there is changes ahead. Sometimes you can feel that.

Our short trip together showed me I need to be Dominant, I need to plot out ways to jump her. Triggering her into submission. Beat her into it if must be.

Past weeks, with a lot less scene-interaction. I am watching her struggle, emotionally on edge.

I am changing the game. I make her do things she did not do before. Make her say things she would not say before. I use her for my pleasure.

Fuck her when she is very tired. In her tight ass when she does not expect it. Not cumming inside her as I did before, but splashing my cum onto her face, tits, legs, wherever.

It is all within the established boundaries, but I am wandering around. Mixing it up to catch her by surprise and dominate her by forcing her into awkward and humiliating scenes. Using little or no pain.

I am not sure yet, but it seems I am using humiliation to satisfy my sadism. And pain or the threat of pain, to enforce it.


I will need to research this ... cause the filthy, dirty, disgusting, kinky, dark ideas that are arising from this direction make me wonder what kind of animal I am ... *growl*

The wolf inside is rearing his head ...

Of Wolf and Man - Metallica

Just a couple of cents

My oh my, Just going to ramble some thoughts out there ...

My sub is not a pain-masochist.
For me the Sadism is not inflicting pain - per se.

I enjoy watching emotional struggle.

This can be by forcing her to write about something she dislikes, to force her to orgasm when she doesn't feel like it, to make her do things that she finds difficult. I enjoy her emotion when her face looks up at me and I can read from her eyes: "did he just seriously ask me to sniff up his cum from the floor ?"

I use pain/discomfort to guide her into doing it if she doubts to long or resists. To me the amount of pain she can take .. does not matter, I will continue to increase untill she does what I say. Her joy then does not come from the inflicted pain, but from the deep humiliation, the feeling of giving in and doing it ...

I told her to get on all fours, clamped her head between my thights and leaned over her, ripping her panties down .. encompassing and holding her forcefully, fingering her pussy ... when liquids began to flow abundantly, I released her head from between my legs.

"you wanna cum ?"
she nodded, "yes Master"
"then suck My cock and swallow it all, smear your face"

While the last spurt of cum was still gushing from my cock, I grabbed her head. Put it back between my tights. Bend over her back and grasped her ankles firmly ... touching her clit for 5 seconds ... then she erupted .. restrained by my legs and arms ...

Loudest

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Louder

The last day of our kid-less holiday emerged. I decided I wanted to cook a nice dinner for the two of us, but allas, the grocery stores were closed. A dinner for two at a local restaurant overtook the original idea. After taking care of the dogs (walking and feeding) we prepped ourselves to go out. As she was putting on some make-up, I went upstairs to the 'unused' double-bed room. I figured she would not expect any more scenes ...  so wrong ... so wrong.

 

When we arrived the week before, a little tour around the house confronted me with my Dominant streaks. I still look back at myself at times and think, how was this not obvious ... enfin. In all rooms I checked for play posibilities, a small lockable shed, a double-bed room, a seperate sauna room. Scanning for rope attachement points in ceilings, radiator pipes, closets ... and then I noticed a baby crib ...

 

I took the matress out, layed it onto the floor and put the crib upside down ... perfect.

 

Going back downstairs, grabbed a couple of ben-wa balls and hid them in my sunglass-container. Urging subby to hurry up. 

 

As I asked for the check, she said she needed a short restroom break. I gently grabbed her wrist and handed her the sunglass container. I could see her eyes twinkle as she felt the wobbly motion of the balls inside the container. Immediately she knew, this was not the end to the evening. As she returned from the bathrooms, she handed me the empty container. "Good Slut" I whispered.

 

As we entered through the front door I ordered her to get naked. She seemed surprised, and could not focus on undressing. I smacked her ass .."faster bitch". Still no focus .. "FASTER" .. smacking her randomly across her body. And as soon as she was naked, there was a leash on a collar, and nipple clamps with a chain dangling from her big tits. Without any words I pulled her upstairs into the prepped bedroom and commanded her: "GET IN" while lifting the crib.

 

I started groping her arms, belly, tits,  "You are MY cunt", "You will be used as I see fit". As I smacked her with a small hard leather flogger through the openings I made sure she knew, even inside that crib ...

 

"On fours", "close to the end" .. she huddled backwards, pushing out her ass as it pleases me. I groped into her cunt ... dripping ...

 

"YOU FUCKING WET WHORE"

 

she shivered ...

 

 

(read part 2 here) 

Loud

Ordering her to lay down and still. But no need to be quiet. That theme pretty much took the center stage past few days. Making her beg for more. More strikes and more orgasms. Making her ask for my cum on her face. 

 

The way her eyes look at me. Almost disbelief of what is happening.  she is calling out 'i am a whore' .. repeatedly, louder and louder .. while fucking herself with a dildo and jerking me off. She cums again, groaning and moaning .. yelping as I hit her all over with a flat hand.

 

 

her legs hog tied on the front, being drilled with virbators in her ass and eggs on her clit for another set of orgasms, pushing my feet in her face ... she falls asleep panting. Still wearing the cuffs.

 

Somewhere in the middle of the night I release her from her bounds, holding her tightly. Waking her up the next morning by licking her clit and ass .. stopping just before she cums, driving her to the edge, begging me. I make her confess her desire for several cocks to fill her up, and when she is to exhausted to resist I turn her onto her belly and fuck her deliciously tight ass, cumming all over her back ...

 

Holidays, without the kids are rough, loud and very .. very .. hot.

Changeling

I love it when her mind goes from:

- No Master, there is no desire from me to orgasm ...

to:

- Please Master, can I cum now ?


Choking her, forcefully pinning her down. Lying on top, while roughly fucking, legs half openened. Panting, moaning. her tits jiggling. her muscles flenching.

We will have 8 days with just the two of us, no kids ... It will be pain and bliss combined.

Shaping the rules (4) - Pizza

Back from a nice week in France, heading onto a week with just the two of us and the dogs in the no man's countryside (north-east). At home for a couple of days, to send the teens off to their own holidays.

Yesterday was review and evaluation day. There was mainly one topic on the table. 'Asking for permission to orgasm'. I can not elaborate much on this now, but it became clear that there was an underlying thought pattern that has started to devellop into a direction I don't want. The rule will most likely be suspended for some time as I will search for better balance and development into the desired direction.

My focus was not on the cumming, it was on the 'asking permission', the controll. Her focus was on the orgasm, how to prevent it, untill granted allowed. We have gotten some idea's on the table and will start to play with them, to see what could work.

There was one moment during the family holiday where the kids were out by themselves and we had a couple of hours to ourselves. I did pack tie wraps, a vibrating egg and a small leather flogger (rather stingy). She was bent over the back of the chair, hands locked to the front legs, her ass perking backwards. The egg purring away at her g-spot .. the flogger harshly reddening her skin. There were some yelps, some moans and a rough fuck and deep seeding.
Leaving her panting for 10 minutes, returning and forcing her to cum twice more before tucking her into the sheets for a cuddle-nap ... untill the loud voices of kids, bringing home pizza, and knocking the door woke us up again.

It felt like claiming her ... this past week, to me, clearly indicates I need this thing we do ...

Click on this link for the previous post: Shaping the rules (3)

Travels

I was on a business trip to Connecticut. There was no time to play long distance. Travelling, unpacking, eating, meeting, sleeping, repeating. I upgraded to business class on the intercontinental return flight to catch up on sleep.

D/s is suffering .. and this mornings rule breaking makes me growl. She came without permission, and told me she deliberately did so ... but there is no time for corrections now, as we are packing up for a short trip to France. 3 kids, 2 dogs and a load of stuff.

I did hide some toys into the luggage. But I am not sure if this holiday will have any appropriate timeslot for 'play'.

I initially had put vacations as non D/s time. Last revision we took it out. Lets see how things work out ...

Goodmorning

Past few days are full of stress. Leaving me tired at the end of the day. I know subby is craving a forcefull approach and a hard cock slutty-fying her. But taking control and falling asleep do not mix well.

This morning she had a rest day from her exercise plan. When I woke up her ass cheecks were smiling at me ... she was still asleep. I started fucking her in her sleep .. keeping the rythm slow but firm. She woke up and moaned lightly. I knew she had trouble switching but I wanted her to forget the stress, feel owned and used.

I came and pulled out .. leaving for the shower.

When I got downstairs, drinking my so needed espresso subby texted me. Asking approval to use a vibrator. I responded with a yes, and the condition to see it in action while my cum was still dripping out.

It didn't take long for the picture to arrive. When i came back from the short morning walk with the dogs she had just gotten out of the shower.

I waited for her to enter the room, subby thought I would say goodbye. Instead I pushed her onto the bed. Ordering the legs spread, applying the wand and after another orgasm. Hitting her all over with the selfmade crop.

I am in charge.

Heat, hot, hurt

The heat wave in the Netherlands (94F/34C) is taking some fun away. We don not have airconditioning, as normaly the temps not even go above 72F/22C. So everything is getting laid back. I am actually glad subby was rather obedient so no discipline was needed. I think whacking her ass for half an hour with a whip would be pretty tough ...

 

I fucked her for release a few times, cumming on her belly or tits, but she had not been allowed to cum for a couple of days, thus the attributes layed out on the bed where gleamed at, and I saw a faint smile.

 

 

Blindfolding her, gagging her, putting the rope harnass on linked to her wrists with single collumn ties. Tightening the lower part of the harnass as she moves her hands outwards. It all took only a few minutes.

 

I told her to use the two dildo's. Switching every time she orgasmed, smacking her all over her body with the small leather flogger. After several orgasms I pushed one dildo in and locked it with the rope, using the magic wand on her clit till she came again, and again.

 

 

 

Turning her around, her limbs loosely flaping around (how nice !)... smacking her ass a few times and fucking her from behind in between the ropes. Which I will never do again. My cock hurt for hours ...

 

*laughs*

 

I wont be repeating that move again I think ...

 

 

 

 

 

PS, And for those who read from US, happy 4th of July.

Shaping the rules (3)

Yesterday it was the 29th, our monthly review and evaluation day. I like the ritual feeling of this day. In the end no rules or wishes changed. Some changes in the sub-check-list.

Generally lots of thoughts flow through my mind that try to reflect how I see the dynamic and all the aspects within our relationship.

Last time I changed the contract around. I split it in three parts.
1) The general contract defining how the dynamic is set up. Who is submissive, who is the Dominant which responsibilities there are, including things like this monthly review, safewords and the sub-check list. How emergencies can break the contract, all essential basics, but no behavioral descriptions.
2) The rules
3) The wishes of the Dominant

Within the 1st part is is also described how these relate to each other:

The contract goes above the rules
The rules go above the will of the submissive and Master
The will of the Master goes above the will of the submissive
The will of the submissive goes above the wishes of the Master
The wishes of the master are suggestions for the submissives behavior

This enabled me to make much more consise and clear rules, and provided much more structure.
Of course there are no rules that go against my will :)  And the cascading enables us to implement the aspect of her 'little (bratty) girl' side. This little must follow the rules, but can decide to not follow the wishes.

Learning how to integrate our own dynamic into our lives as we go along is an exciting experience !

Click on this link for the previous post: Shaping the rules (2)

Permission

The past few days I felt like focussing on her asshole. It has been fucked deep and hard, it has collected my cum several times. More then once I got very intense and saw tears rolling down her face. But she took the ass plundering like a good slut.

 

There was a bug though. She had cum twice without permission a couple of days ago, and allthough I understand those two were difficult to handle, I did not want to let it pass.

 

The rules are clear:

• In Masters presence you will ask for permission to cum.
• If Master orders you to cum, you will do so as fast and as hard as you can.

So subby was set on the edge of the bed and box-tied with soft pink rope. She was collared and nipple clamped and told to stand up. She was lectured shortly, looking down shyly. Then she was forced to cum three times, while her ass was paddled on two small area's. The bright red glow was magnificent.

 

 

Then she was unleashed, the chains pushed into her wet hole, her mouth gagged, and the magic wand was set upon her clit. Laying on her own arms for three additional orgasms. I zapped the chain out, sending droplets of her wetness flying through the air. I could see she was exhausted. There was no resistance anymore as I flipped her around and started to fuck the wet cunt from behind.

The legs and red asscheecks wobbling with my pace. 

 

The "thank you Master" as I seeded her deep inside, made me feel warm and fuzzy, and after untying her I pulled her into my arms to fall asleep.

 

Forgiven.

Finishing up

So ... we had some finishing up to do.

Some girl got the chain of the leash in her cunt after being blindfolded.
Then she was paddled on the inside of her tights. Pulled over the bed roughly and repeatedly. That involved deep kissing and smacking her down on the bed.

Then the leash was removed, with a light whimper, and attached to her collar. Only to pull her off off the bed. She was bend over and her ass was severely smacked with a leather strap.

Landing her on her knees, her cunt on top of a dildo, that fucked her fast and deep. More whimpering took place.

Then this girls wrists got cuffed and her throat was fucked for her Masters pleasure. Lots of gagging was involved.

Then her ass was fiercely slapped again and she got fucked doggystyle, and seeded deep in her cunt.

She was helped out of her position and kindly tucked into the duvey. Kissed and cherished for being a realy good girl.

Interrupted

I planned the scene in the afternoon. Both the teens claimed to be out tonight not returning before 2 AM. Yay.

 

Blindfolded, tying her wrists together, to the headboard, and her ankles to the corner of the bed. Leaving her pussy exposed and open. I pushed some geisha balls in, thinking that would be nice when she was squirming around.

 

I flogged her ass, starting gently till the soft pink glow started to show.

 

"Are you ready ?" - "Yes Master" - smacking the flogger onto the left cheek.

"Are you ready ?" - "Yes Master" - smacking the flogger onto the right cheek.

"Are you ready ?" - "Yes Master" - smacking the flogger onto the left cheek.

"Are you ready ?" - "Yes Master" - smacking the flogger onto the right cheek.

 

Leaving her for a couple of seconds to let the impact sink in... Repeating the 4 strikes untill she said "No Master", and continued anyway. Having her squirm and trying to dodge the impact. Her panting and moaning was delicious and I decided to fill the pauses with magic wand, dildo, fucking and wax.

 

 

Wax was a first .. I tested it on myself in the afternoon to check for good distance as the candle was coloured and that could indicate a higher melting temperature. When the first drops hit her back, she shot forward like an animal, yelping. But there was no escape ..

 

Except for the phone that started ringing. My son was panicking. One of his friends hurt his foot by a broken bottle and they were trying to get home. 

 

So ... no aftercare for subby, I released her from her bounds, shoved the toys in a bag, grabbed my first aid kit and jumped into my car. It was a little over 3 AM when I finally returned from the emergency room.

 

Subby was soundly sleeping. Curling up to her I fell asleep a little later... now we will have to start all over again tonight ...

 

 

 



 

 

 

 

Breaching the wall

Subby was not so pleased with Master, making her wear the vibrating egg, the whole day. Untill the batteries ran out.

He had forgotten about it, and she took it out without permission. An infraction yielding two red asscheecks.

So i found her in bed, grumbling, curled up. Ordering her to open her legs .. licking her pussy. Slapping her ass a couple of times. Using a small vibe, a finger in her ass. Slowly turning her mood from ... 'i will let you'  to the fucking slut that begs ... 'Master .. please .. may i cum'. Putting my foot on her face ... rubbing her faster .. ordering her release.

'How many cocks do you want cunt ?'

'Three Sir!'

Putting my balls on her mouth. Ordering her to lick them while jerking me off on her tits and getting fingered deep to a squirting second orgasm .. then receiving my cum.

Mine

Pretty in pink

Some time ago subby explained to me that she felt like there were multiple submissive energies or mindsets that influenced her behavior as a sub.

The first being a dirty perverse cock addicted slut that willingly submits to all inquiries. More slave like. For me to use sexually whenever I like.

The second, a rather young submissive girl, wanting to explore the world and doing girly things, innocently discovering sexuality and service.

I fell silent. A revelation from deep down inside of her, exposing, vulnerable. I realy did not know what to say. But as she was telling the story, I could connect some of the behavioral dots. 

 

She told me some fantasies about dressing up girly, in pink. Sitting in her room doing girls stuff. She has to write little stories, and make drawings for me. Learn to expand her english vocabulary by reading english books and keeping track of words she learns. And if she misbehaves or fails a test the King will spank her, only with pink implements off course. Pink is her favourite colour.
 

What is interesting is that although it sounds like roleplay, I dont think it is. It is more mood dependant. It enhances how I interact towards her as a Dominant, adressing more what she needs as a submissive in that mood.

 

To bad I dont have a pink butt-plug ... yet :-) And making her do simple math while fucking her brains out was ... awesome

  



19 Random facts (2)

The random facts are spreading like the flu, but hey, they are fun :)

fiona at Sir Q and me has given me the number 18, but I dont like 18, I prefer 19 so here are 19 somewhat rambling random facts about me:

If you comment on this writing I will give you a number between 1 and 20 and you can share that many random facts about you if you wish.  There is no obligation if you don't wish to write about yourself!

Vanilla:

1) During a large part of university studies, all financial transactions were converted into amounts of "Cuba Libre" as a kind of currency. I still enjoy BaCo's a lot, but financially the Euro has taken over.
2) I like coocking outdoors. Bought a big green egg 2 years ago, still very happy with that purchase.
3) Besides dogs, I have a 120 gallon freshwater tank downstairs, keeping 16 discus fish. And 7 smaller 15 gallon  breeding tanks upstairs.
4) I still havent bought an new EDC knife. On my first business trip to the US,Portland - Oregon, 17 years ago, I bought an original leatherman. Still in service today. What a tool !
5) Today was the first tropical day of 2015 in the Netherlands .. over 30 degrees celcius. And I do not get a nice suntan ... so I'm in the shade.
6) I never thought I would wear boots one day, but I am realy happy with the pair I bought last week. Good fit, and my submissive likes them a lot. To bad she now has an additional chore: naked boot polishing
7) I never carry cash anymore. I realy have to plan ahead if I need to tip somewhere in cash.
8) In my early twenties I played roleplaying and collectible card games (MtG). Such a nerd :-)
9) I am terrible at sports requiring balls. I dont know ... giving it direction is hopeless.

Kink:

10) I always hated condoms, gosh, these things are a burden. And yes I used them and teach my kids to use them, but still.
11) We owned quite some toys before ttwd entered our lives, even a very small flogger. I never dared using that on her ... I was such a fool ... hehe.
12) Triggered by Rye at chasing me chasing you: Feeling like a satisfied zombie, due to late night scening, to little sleep, and not yet enough coffee is quite nice.
13) A relationship without oral sex doesn't exist for me. It must be a mutual need. I am training her to comfortably deepthroat me, she keeps claiming i am to big.
14) I am not, my cock is average sized.
15) We started experimenting with golden showers. I feel primal by doing that .. it feels natural even. I do remember, long ago in vanilla days, that it happened in the shower once and that she didn't object ... I was such a fool ... hehe.
16) 50 shades of grey motivated her, to come forth and confront me with those little tell tales in which I resemble mr. Grey. Though I find him repulsive and irresponsible (at least in the movie, never read the books). I did understand what she meant, and asked her if she would like me to set up some rules for her ... and so my quest for becoming a good Dominant started. As well as the evolution into our 24/7 mixed BDSM relationship. Some more details about my Domspace, I wrote up in Midas the Dominant.
17) Blushing is a turn on for me. It is the betrayal of innocence I guess :)
18) I like falling asleep cuddled up, with my cock deep inside her. Does that count as aftercare ?

Bonus:
19) I currently believe that satisfaction is the key to happiness.

If any of these facts trigger deeper questions ..feel free :-) and this is the link to former random facts about me.

Bruisecropping

About a week ago, she showed me a bruise. The first official unintended mark that survived 12 hours. Located on the border off ass-cheek and upper-thigh. I remember .. i hit her there with my fist earlier that week. To make her cum harder, off course.

Later that evening, using the crop, all over her body, when by accident I hit exactly that location. Pillow muffled oooh's and aaaah's yelped  from her mouth. I focussed on that location.

Did I realise I was hitting her on the bruise ?
Why do I like bruisecropping ?

I don't like it for the pain it inflicts, I like it because I see and hear her struggle. If I can't put her on the edge, I am far less satisfied by the scene.

Hmmm *pondering while writing this post*

So its not the fact that she is helpless or surrendered and obeying ? I guess not.

Hmmm *pondering some more*

It is when my cum engulfs her mouth as she sucks my cock deep. And I keep reading on my phone as if nothing happens. And she starts to wonder and doubt, is it right or wrong ? Did he enjoy ? Does he approve ? Does he even notice ?

Hmmm *pondering and rubbing my eyebrows*

I enjoy and get aroused, plotting the cruelty beforehand ...

Hmmm *smirks*

okay, that qualifies as sadist ...

Ostrich Power

I was running late, I had just driven to Rotterdam to buy new boots, pick up some cooking gear for the bbq, and I still wanted to buy a new vibrating egg. The current one drains these shitty small batteries within an hours. And I like to mess her up for much longer then that !

I went straight for the dildo and vibrator section, searched for one that kept AAA size (rechargeable) batteries and then browsed around some more. Those signal whips were whispering at me, as were some canes and a dragontail. But I was looking for something else which is very difficult for my sub to cope with.

Feathers

I used to browse bdsm shop sites and skip this no pain section. The idea of just softly brushing her skin, yuk. But .. as it goes with kink .. I was wrong.

A few weeks ago I had bought some nice nipple clamps with small weights and very pink feathers. And after removing them at the end of a scene, I clamped them on a cane, while she was still tied up. Using the tip of the cane to gently poke her. I started stroking her nipples with the feathers to slowly let her return from subspace. Ran them along her waisteline and all of a sudden the magic happened. She squirmed and moaned something.

"Lie still !!"

Her eyes opened up and I saw her fear, immediately sending me off to Domspace. The ropes holding her pose, I tickled her, smacked her for every move she made, and tickled her more. In minutes she was begging me to stop.

"please Master, I am exploding .. please .. PLEASE .. P L E A S E"

The feathers, continuously running down her inner thighs, over her clit, and back up the other leg. She was biting her lip, frowning her face, fighting the restraints, shaking and shivering.

When I issued the order to cum, tapping her clit with the tip of the cane, I could see her eyes turn into her skull. A deep growling moan as she curled her back off off the bed. I watched her pussy contract, the pale white creamy cum oozing out. By the power of the Ostrich, fuck whips, buy feathers :)

 

I guess there is more sweet sadist in me then I dare admit ... as I did pass the whips, and bought a black ostrich feather.

The look on her face when I came home yesterday, holding the plastic bag with the feather sticking out of the top. As I took out the new vibrating egg and showed it to her. her eyes kept gleaming at the feather.

I just smiled,
evilly ...